Good Manners Cost Fuck All

The world is full of arseholes
And they’re all out and about today,
Pushing in queues and swearing,
Refusing to give right of way.

What’s happened to politeness?
What’s happened to a little respect?
Noone gives a damn these days,
But who could seriously object

To good manners when they cost so little,
When in fact they don’t cost a thing?
You’d think that would be obvious
But instead you have to wring

Politeness from people,
It’s worse than pulling a tooth,
I don’t understand their problem,
Why they all have to be so uncouth.

So the world is full of arseholes
And they’re out and about every day,
Pushing in queues and swearing,
Oh take these rude bastards away,

To somewhere a long way from here,
Teach them some manners and sense.
Hammer it in if you have to,
Prevent this constant offence.

Wash out their gobs with carbolic,
Make them say “thank you” and “please”,
Reinstill some good manners,
Make them get down on their knees,

And say, “I’m sorry, I beg your forgiveness,
“I’ll be polite from now on I swear,”
Send out a loud, clear message:
If you forget good manners, beware!

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